r/clevercomebacks • u/maybenotarobot429 • 16d ago
Hide my boat? Nah.
Link to the story: https://news.artnet.com/art-world/fence-boat-painting-artist-hanif-panni-2487875/amp-page
TL;DR the city ordered a guy to build a fence to hide his boat, so he got his neighbor to paint an extremely realistic mural of the boat on it.
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u/snake19m 16d ago
I love how passive aggressive this is!
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u/fraseybaby81 16d ago
This is some elite level shithousery 🤣
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u/WizogBokog 16d ago
I just hope the dude who painted the fence was laughing like the joker the whole time.
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u/LilBayBayTayTay 16d ago
Petty as fuck… and absolute mensch for doing it.
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u/kein_plan_gamer 16d ago
Ahh Hallo Autokorrektur.
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u/spreetin 15d ago
The English loanword from Yiddish "mensch" kinda does fit here, so I'm not so sure it's a German autocorrect.
If it was a German autocorrect I would expect it to be capitalised, while the Yiddish word wouldn't be.
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u/Corni_20 16d ago
Diese kommentarsektion ist nun Eigentum der BRD
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u/AuricOxide 16d ago
Ich melde mich zum Dienst.
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u/PirateSanta_1 16d ago
I'll never understand people who complain about things like this. The boat was already backed up in a driveway, out of the way and a nusance to nobody.
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u/USSMarauder 16d ago
Why you will never catch me living in a neighborhood with an HOA
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u/captkckass 16d ago
That was the first thing I told my realtor when shopping for my house.
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u/USSMarauder 16d ago
If the best place to grow tomatoes in my new house is in the front yard, then that's where they're going.
(And yes, I know about the few feet that the city can dig without my permission, that's where the flowers will go.)
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u/streetkiller 16d ago
We did the same. Then a year into owning the city went buck wild with new rules and are acting like an hoa.
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15d ago
How do HOA's continue to exist? All I have ever heard from popular media and personal stories and internet interactions is that they are literally the most horrific things in existence. It seems like literally everyone shopping for a house would be like "nothing with an HOA tho, I don't want to suck Satan's cock every day for the rest of my life" since that's what happens in HOA's as far as I can tell.
How are houses in HOA's not worthless since no one wants to buy them given this?
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u/captkckass 15d ago
Just goes to prove there are plenty of people who enjoy "sucking Satan's cock every day" lol
But seriously there are people who are like OCD they need everything to look pristine and perfect. I'll admit those neighborhoods do look visually appealing, but I don't think that is worth the hassle. Mostly rich retired people who have nothing to do but be in everyone else's business.
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13d ago
I am sure for some people… but why do they even sell to someone that doesn’t fit the social profile they want in the first place?
I guess that’s the obvious problem. Let these weirdo old OCD people live in their own places.
I also don’t even totally get it as OCD. I suffer from OCD personally. I have to pump the gas thing in and out exactly 30 times every time. I also have a horrible need to touch my fingertips to my lips/teeth in specific ways that is incredibly socially embarrassing.
But I never make everyone at the gas station pump theirs in and out exactly 30 times or force people to touch their fingers to their teeth when I do… so I don’t know if I buy using me and the people who also suffer from this fucked up condition as a scapegoat for total fucking assholes makes sense.
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u/captkckass 13d ago
I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend with the OCD part of my comment. I cannot begin to comprehend your struggles, but I never said that all OCD people are assholes. I was trying to explain the people I know who have an almost compulsive need to have things around them visually appealing. I am not a psychologist so maybe OCD is not the right term? Or maybe OCD is the correct term? Honestly I have known enough people to say that just because someone is an asshole doesn't mean that every person in any race/religion/sex/political/mental disabilities/etc should be assumed to be assholes.
I feel like most people who end up brawling with HOA bought without understanding. Or maybe leadership changes and so do strict policies.
As for prohibiting someone from moving in is against the law. What if they are racist and don't let colored people move in? They could then just come up with an excuse to justify why they don't have a "social profile"
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13d ago
I wasn't totally offended, just pointing out that these seemingly highly planned and coordinated assholes don't seem like OCD to me. Maybe they all do have OCD that extends out into the world, but fuck, if that's true we should re-label HOA communities as severe mental health communities.
On the other hand, it sucks horribly for the rest of us with actual socially embarrassing behaviors from OCD being linked with these outright assholes since it makes everyone less sympathetic to those of us who are just embarrassing and easy targets in comparison to these people holed up in their glistening perfectly manicured and guarded palaces.
Seems like the fact that any discrimination based on colour of skin or race being wildly illegal would force no HOA to ever be able to include race or skin colour in a social profile ever. If you want to ban people "who like rap music" or some shit, so what? It's a racist stereotype in the first place to argue only black people like rap music. Also, who could reasonably say that someone who listens to music so loudly they disrupt their entire neighborhood should necessarily be forced upon someone?
Most cases of racist organizations trying to skirt the current laws have been ruled as violating the current laws when I've looked into this. For example, not hiring people with "black names" turns out to be just as illegal as if you have a policy that says "don't hire black people" according to the law. So how does that not prevent the creation of racist social profiles? Same with sexuality or religion?
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u/RegressToTheMean 16d ago edited 16d ago
It's almost impossible to build a new house without an HOA. I hate HOAs, but to build in a desirable area on the East Coast makes it almost impossible to do otherwise
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u/largepig20 16d ago
Not all HOA's are terrible. Our HOA covers all landscaping, which is a godsend for us because during the summer months we're out of town nearly every weekend. They don't want broken down things in visible from street areas. They don't let you park your dog outside and leave it howling all night.
They provide groomed walking paths, a park, cover water/sewer/trash as part of the HOA fees, and generally let you do whatever you want, as long as it doesn't impact or affect the neighborhood.
Been there 5 years now, and have loved every second of it, coming from my previous neighborhood.
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u/yellowroosterbird 16d ago
That's crazy to me. I grew up in a pretty wealthy part of the East coast and no one I knew was part of an HOA.
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u/Business-Drag52 16d ago
So don’t build a new house?
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u/RegressToTheMean 16d ago
Sometimes - as it was in our case - the most economically feasible option
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u/Fena-Ashilde 16d ago
I believe it. My spouse’s cousin bought land and built their house on it, because, altogether, it was half the price of any house that already existed out there. Kinda insane to think about.
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u/benanza 16d ago
I mean, not really that insane right. The value is in the thing when it’s built. Otherwise it’s just land with a shit ton of building materials on it.
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u/Fena-Ashilde 16d ago
You know what? Very fair point.
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u/EducationalTell5178 16d ago
You can move into a house, you can't exactly move onto land with a house that's coming in 8 months lol. I think building a house is really just for those who want very specific and custom amenities.
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u/canman7373 16d ago
Pretty tough not to live in one in my part of FL. Without living somewhere pretty undesirable.
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u/CarpeNivem 16d ago
It depends, though. I see so many horror stories on reddit about HOAs which seem to exist solely to push bullshit rules, but the HOA where I live barely has any rules (and the ones they do have are reasonable, and they seem pretty lax about enforcing them anyway) so mostly what the HOA does is yard work, snow plowing, pool maintenance, etc.
And I guess I have no idea how to find one type of HOA without accidentally moving into a neighborhood with the other kind. :-/
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u/largepig20 16d ago
My HOA is similar. Takes care of the outside areas, makes sure people don't have trash piling up, and makes it so irresponsible pet owners can't park their dogs outside, and leave the howling and annoying the rest of the neighborhood.
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u/fractalife 16d ago
So, an improvement association, effectively. They can't force people to join and can't enforce any rules. But people pay their dues for things like what you mentioned. I'm all about those. But fuck HOAs.
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u/Captain_Jeep 16d ago
And it's not even a bad looking boat. If it was old and falling apart sure that would warrant a comment maybe but it's in mint condition.
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
The problem is it's far easier for the city to enforce "no large vehicles allowed in view" as opposed to trying to quantify how clean the vehicles must be
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u/RegularWhiteShark 16d ago
It says the city ordered him to hide it, not a HOA.
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u/PirateSanta_1 16d ago
I didn't say it was an HOA but its the same either way. Someone saw a boat sitting in a driveway inconveniencing nobody and complained about it because rules like this don't get enforced without someone complaining about it
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u/Senior-Discussion902 16d ago
It doesnt say either, though.
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u/Seared_Beans 16d ago
Something to do with property value or whatever.
But wouldn't boats present in a beach area be good for property value???
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u/Illeazar 16d ago
I've got a neighbor who, ever since we moved to this street, has complained about every single thing in our front yard that isn't a blade of turf type tall fescue. He does these "yard shows" where a bunch of people come look at his yard, and he can't stand the idea of someone seeing anything offensive in a neighbor's yard when they come to see his yard. I've been working on him over the years and finally have a halfway decent relationship. This year he invited me to come see his yard show in a couple weeks--and offered free tickets! This whole time people have been paying money to come look at his yard. Some people just really don't have much going on in their lives.
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u/GiannaSushi 16d ago edited 16d ago
Any idiot trying to steal that boat will end up crashing into the fence and if the fence had this, it would be wonderful
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u/aDisgruntledGiraffe 16d ago
HOAs really should be illegal.
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
There was no HOA involved here
This was a city ordinance. The government told him to do that
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u/aDisgruntledGiraffe 16d ago
Ah. True. I didn't see the story linked as I'm on mobile.
Point still stands tho. Fuck HOAs. lol
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
Yeah a lot of them are trash
But at their core as a concept they're basically just neighborhood government
Local governments are always filled with crazy idiots with too much free time. Same with school boards and the like
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u/OtoDraco 16d ago
Not much of a difference in consequences between Karen getting into office and Karen joining a HOA board.
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
Sure
But HOAs aren't the problem then, Karens are the problem
HOAs weren't even involved here
Should City Governments be illegal too? They are the ones who wrote this municipal code and issued the guy the legal warnings
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16d ago
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u/Redjester016 16d ago
Funny how those things still get done in areas without hoas
Almost like they're completely unnecessary
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u/Business-Drag52 16d ago
What? My town doesn’t have any HOA neighborhoods. The city takes care of all the things you mentioned. Don’t mow your yard? The city does and puts the bill on your property tax. Everything just has to be to city ordinance. No random boomer with too much time on their hands and no hobbies dictating the exact height my grass has to be or the correct shade of white for my shutters
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u/DStaal 16d ago
Not your grass, not the snow in your driveway - the grass in the park the developer put in that isn’t a city park, the snow on the streets that the developer had to build because the city wouldn’t build it out before the housing would get built, etc.
Some of it there are good arguments for having the city (if there is one…) do it, but there are also reasons why it is getting done this way.
That random boomer could just as easily get themselves elected into the city council in most places - the issue is the control freak in charge, not necessarily the group that they are in charge of.
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u/Business-Drag52 16d ago
Getting a city ordinance passed has a lot more steps than putting an HOA rule in place. If the stuff isn’t maintained the city WILL maintain it or they will have it removed. All of it should be on the city. I don’t need some random neighbors taking care of that shit. I already pay taxes to cover those services, why pay an hoa fee on top of that?
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u/OtoDraco 16d ago
isn't it also the case that HOAs almost entirely depend on contractors to do anything while cities are much more likely to have full time employees? contractors for everything is far more expensive and inefficient, likelihood of corruption/kickbacks is extremely high
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u/tizzlenomics 16d ago
Bizarre. In my country, we pay taxes to the government to do those sorts of things.
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u/aDisgruntledGiraffe 16d ago
Just cause we get jack ass ones that pop up on reddit does not mean all are evil
When you go to buy a home, a HOA can legally deny you access to see their rules unless your offer to buy a house has been accepted.
They can literally fine you for speeding 2mph above the speed limit. They are not police. They are not the government. Yet they can still hit you with a multi hundred dollar fine.
People have lost their homes because HOAs hit them with so many fines over petty shit and then get lawyers involved, the home is foreclosed on by the HOA. And then the home is sold at auction. In Colorado alone, HOAs filed more than 2,400 foreclosure cases from January 2018 to February 2022.
And to top it off, most states do not have a government agency to help people with abusive HOAs.
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u/Ok_Drop3803 16d ago
Huh? You can't cut your grass or remove snow in a community? What does that even mean?
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u/That_guy1425 16d ago
No, its for the shared property. My HOA does all the landscaping for the area, which includes communal stretches between complexes, areas surrounding the lot, area and trees by the dumpster. If we only did our own stretches no one would do those.
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u/OtoDraco 16d ago
they absolutely are evil. if they weren't evil then participation would be voluntary, yet it's almost always mandatory. and if you don't pay them, they can sell your fully paid off house for $1000 and you get nothing. they also give themselves the right to go on your property at any time with trespass immunity and a billion other things. it's beyond criminal.
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u/DBNSZerhyn 16d ago
... Listen, I understand "lol HOA bad" and all that, blah blah blah, but why wouldn't it be mandatory? You're moving into a place that ostensibly is providing additional services, so why should you benefit for free while all your neighbors are paying? The issue is when HOA's have shitty or overpriced services and too-strict regulation, which you can be aware of and counter by simply... not living there.
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u/OtoDraco 16d ago
i've been house hunting for months and the first thing i do is look up the HOA documentation (which they keep giving me shit for). not a single one of them provides services beyond what a regular city would (such as driveway clearing, landscaping, insurance...) and the services HOA do provide are price gouged, so that's a bullshit excuse at best and a front at worst.
so why should you benefit for free while all your neighbors are paying
paying is only half the issue, i could stomach the $300/yr for trash removal (including karen kickbacks) if it didn't also come with boomers and reddit mods like yourself telling me my porch lights are 10 kelvin too warm or that i can't have a fucking vegetable garden in my own backyard and they get to take the house if i don't like it
simply... not living there.
just don't call it a sale then, it's just renting with extra steps and fewer rights
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u/EricUtd1878 16d ago
That's my level of pettiness if HOA's ever became a thing in the UK!
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u/Doublebow 16d ago
They kind of already are, they just go by different names. My parents live in a fancy new build estate where they have to pay a fee and have to keep their grass to a certain level and can only have certain colour doors etc. I live in an ex council house and their is a restrictive covenant that controls what I can and can't do in my garden (not allowed to grow veg, or keep chickens etc).
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u/Icy_Treat9782 16d ago
What is the issue with veg? I understand chickens especially if it’s a smaller garden, but vegetables?
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u/Doublebow 16d ago
I don't know, I haven't looked at it in a while but there were quite a few odd restrictions like that.
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u/Icy_Treat9782 16d ago
Fair enough. I had no idea we had restrictions like that in the uk. Especially for privately owned ex council homes.
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u/williamhpark 16d ago
You'd think John Constable would be capable of painting his own painting of a boat
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u/SearchStack 16d ago
Was looking for a comment like this as was first thing I noticed, ironic name for the situation
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u/VirtuaCoffee 16d ago
The number of times this has been posted recently, and this is the first time I paid attention to the name.
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u/Archmagos_Browning 16d ago
Doesn’t it look weird in other seasons, like winter and fall, when the plants wouldn’t be green?
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u/pyrotrap 16d ago
I thought the fence was glass or some other transparent material until I finished reading the headline. That’s a damn good paint job.
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u/Aggressive-Expert-69 16d ago
They should've known if he's got money to build a fence he's got money to be petty too
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u/InsanityLF 16d ago
Consequence of houses being seen as investments. Oh what will we do about the property value with an eye sore like that /s.
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u/rikeoliveira 16d ago
Guy has a boat. He either has more money than he can spend or make stupid decisions, everything points out to something petty like this.
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u/cherniyvovan 16d ago
Ordered by whom exactly? Or is there some kind of stupid law in america about private boats on private properties?
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
law in america
There are 90,000 governmental bodies in the US. 1 federal government, 50 state governments, 3,000 county governments, 35,000 township governments, 40,000 other 'local government entities'
Some of them have neighborhood ordinances against storing boats/RVs/trailers in plain sight or in the street
This comment is like asking if the EU has some law in place governing the fence heights within a neighborhood in a French countryside town
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u/cherniyvovan 16d ago
Nope, fence height makes sense, need to cover your property that is not of illegal on nsfw category - is not
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
My point is less about which laws make sense and more about the scope of the government you're talking about
The EU doesn't make local municipal decisions. Neither does "America" have standard widespread laws about super local issues at a national level.
Those are both gigantic governments overseeing massive swaths of people. Some places in America have these laws, some places don't. They're local issues.
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u/JasonIsFishing 16d ago
This is what LD would do. And you’d find him lampin’ in the front yard waiting for someone to complain. A spite fence.
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u/WendigoCrossing 16d ago
So just out of curiosity, from anyone who would actually be in support of the boat being hidden, what are your reasons?
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u/Bountiful_Corruption 16d ago
See an article that called the painting a "spite mural" and I laughed so hard i pulled a muscle.
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u/JimWanders 16d ago
Im already down a few $$ paying for the fence, whats another few hundred to spite em.
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u/bowinarrow 16d ago
I think there is a benefit to children having access to great technology - as long as it is monitored.
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u/maybenotarobot429 16d ago
For everyone posting about how this has been posted a million times in this sub, are you serious? I don't mean that confrontationally. I read the sub several times per week and I've never seen this posted here before. In fact I've never seen it posted anywhere before, and the article I linked to was published yesterday. I did a search for the word "boat" and the word "fence" and found nothing. I honestly have no idea what you're talking about lol.
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u/Rocket_Panda_ 16d ago
Saw the pic with gate closed. Thought it was a see through fence😭 me so stupid
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u/WestCoastTrawler 15d ago
My favorite artist painted the scene.
https://www.etsy.com/listing/1730792801/painting-of-a-boat-on-a-fence-to-spite
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u/alwaysastrid 5d ago
If I had a boat I’d call it ‘not Penny’s’, ok I probably wouldn’t but my hubs did in a game he was playing.
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u/PapaPendragon 16d ago
IMHO, if you can’t tell that the fence is there, they haven’t fulfilled their obligation
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u/WendigoCrossing 16d ago
You'd think that the presence of the boat would be welcome, as it could indicate affluence and raise the value of nearby properties with that perception
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u/HellsTubularBells 16d ago
Truly affluent people store their boat at the marina, not in their driveway.
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u/CommentsOnOccasion 16d ago
Sure if it's a nice new boat that is kept clean
Can pretty quickly turn a neighborhood into a junk bulk storage area though, and it's harder to govern and enforce the cleanliness of a boat than it is to simply forbid them from street-side storage
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u/i-evade-bans-14 16d ago
only the eleventy billionth time some karma fuckstick has made it a chore to wade past this repost
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u/SlumberingSnorelax 16d ago
r/maliciouscompliance